


1000 Paper Cranes

by orphan_account



Category: British Actor RPF
Genre: Angst, Drama, F/M, Life Introspection, Magical Realism, Marriage of Convenience
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-07-18
Updated: 2015-01-02
Packaged: 2018-02-09 09:44:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,959
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1978185
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He was only doing this for publicity, 7 years was the term of their marriage. He had 7 years to play the role of a good fiancé and best husband. He had 7 years to give her the best memories in her life.</p><p>They only had 7 years before it all expires.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

It was all a boost for publicity and though he thought that he didn't need it, he still allowed Luke to continue with it but with the stipulation that he'd be the one to choose. He already had, after all, in mind who could play the role opposite his, Mrs. Hiddleston could only be played by her and her alone.

 

**_September 16 2006, London, Sussex_ **

**_-2922_ **

 

It was on the autumn of 2006 when the two had met. Tom had decided to explore the woods that acted as the barrier between the cottage they had rented from a family friend through their mother and moderately huge house that his mother's family friend lived in. It was through the artificial lake, as Tom would be told later on, did the two meet. Tom had brought with him a book and was already half way through when the rustling of the nearby bushes alerted him of another presence, he remained seated trusting the knowledge that there were no dangerous creatures inside the woods.

 

The rustling stopped and out popped a little girl wearing a black shirt and trousers, tanned skin and unnerving blank look.

"Hello" he greeted uncertainly, the little girl merely looked at him up and down before greeting a soft and monotone, "Hi" back at him. Then the little girl stepped out of the bushes completely and walked over to him. She was rather large ending just below his sternum.

"What are you reading?" She asked him staring at him with curious eyes.

"a book" He told her too surprised to be able to answer properly.

 

She stared at him for awhile before thanking him and leaving him behind by the lake. It felt like he had missed something quite important.

 

 

It was raining and the cold London air made Luke shiver lightly, Tom was too deep into his thoughts to give notice to the cold which Luke silently cursed him for. Wanting to get out of the cold soon and into the warmth of his flat Luke broke the contemplative silence Tom fell into.

"This girl though, are you really sure about her?" Luke asked he was not quite sold to the idea considering that the girl was half Tom's age.

"She's the only one who could do it" Tom answers still lost to the memories of the past, in the unnerving and emotionless eyes of her.

 

 

_**\- 2914** _

 

Their next meeting happened rather unexpectedly, Tom had come down stairs from his room to have his breakfast, he was still in his pyjamas when he heard the unmistakable sound of his mother cooing on someone. Reaching the last flight of stairs he was greeted by the same emotionless eyes. He blushed and hastily retreated back to his room to change and become presentable.

He was not sure why her eyes kept him awake. He pursed his lips and made sure to erase such thoughts from his mind.

 

"Hello, I'm Joaqui" the little girl greeted him the second time he came down and he greeted her back. Somehow he found himself catching Joaqui's eyes. It feels like he should do something.

 

- _ **2900**_

 

It had been two weeks since their formal introduction but he had yet to find himself close to being Joaqui's friend, it had after all seemed mean of him to be not close towards the little considering how frequently he bumped into her. So on their next meeting he made sure to bring a book that she would enjoy and Alice in Wonderland seemed to be a good one for a child her age.

 

"Would you like me to read with you?" he asked her as an invite to share the book he brought, her silence was still unnerving. She nods her head and softly says "Yes" before heading towards him and lead him to a much comfortable place to read which apparently was the outdoor love seat, he blushed before firmly reminding himself that Joaqui likely didn't know the implications of such things. He then took note that Joaqui was wearing a dress today and wondered what that meant. After settling comfortably Tom opened the book and Joaqui leaned to him they didn't say much at all. Merely reading together and allowed themselves to be immersed in the book.

 

Soon he found himself with a sleeping Joaqui and he smiled at her gently. He felt like he did something good.

 

"Oh, dear she fell asleep on you?" came the soft voice of the peering Aunt Rachel, his mother's friend and Joaqui's care taker for her vacation, "she must be heavy"

Tom merely smiled unsurely and told her, "She's warm just like a kitten"

Aunt Rachel smiled and told him that it was better for Joaqui to wake up inside the music room. Tom didn't question it and found away to carry Joaqui without waking her up, she was indeed heavy but Tom soldiered on. For his male ego.

 

"I was reading Alice in Wonderland with her" Tom said conversationally until he saw the surprised look on Aunt Rachel who was combing her fingers through Joaqui's long wavy hair.

"Is there a problem?" he asked, the polite smile he received made him nervous.

"It's just that I tried to read it to her though she merely told me that she had already read it and she had no interest in it"

Joaqui stirred and sat up slowly blinking the sleep out of her eyes before rubbing it, Aunt Rachel cooed and Joaqui gave her caretaker a small smile before looking at Tom and telling him, "Thank you" and promptly went back to sleep.

"Silly child" Aunt Rachel commented though to Tom it felt like he was the silly one.

 

'How odd' he thought.

 

- _ **2894**_

 

The rest of his days were spent with Joaqui, progressively being her close friend and despite the teasings he received he was quite sure Joaqui wasn't even interested in the opposite gender still he found that he was curious as to what Joaqui considered as her ideal husband after all kids at this age already thought of such didn't they?

 

Joaqui merely stared at him before opting to ignore his question suddenly he felt embarrassed because now that he thought about it 25 year old men don't ask their younger playmate such things less he comes off as a predator.

"...John Watson" she mumbled and Tom found himself relieved it seemed that he was not ignored after all.

"Why?"

Joaqui had stopped her drawing and sat up and stared at it. Tom was still unused to the way Joaqui thought of things deeply, kids shouldn't act that way.

"I-I want to be look at that way too" she stuttered and somehow the act assured Tom that Joaqui was just really eccentric but still a kid.

'Still a kid' he thought reassured even though he supposed that children at her age shouldn't pick up the homoerotic subtext on such books especially considering the debate over it.

"I'm sure you'll find your own Doctor Watson" he told her with an encouraging smile.

 

It was the only time he felt like he was her actual friend instead of someone she tolerated when she had this look of awe on her face.

 

 _**-2887** _

 

The thought of leaving her alone in Sussex with no playmate made his heart ache but he knew that he couldn't afford to extend his vacation any longer since he still needed to prepare for the next term. So he had brought her to the town and made sure she had fun at their last play date. Her sudden stop in front of the glass window made him aware of the want she had in her eyes for a huge black rabbit plush and he smiled at her and tugged at her hand towards the shop. He bought her the rabbit plush and she christened it as "John".

 

He chuckled and patted her head.

"Thank you, Tom" she mumbled with an embarrass smile and red cheeks behind John's head. The two of them left hand in hand from the shop the smile on Joaqui's face settled him.

 

Their farewell didn't end in tears he had given Joaqui his address so she could write him letters after finding out how proficient she already was in spelling and already knew how to write letters properly. If he had looked back as their car drove away he would have seen the shaking shoulders of Joaqui.

 

- _ **2191**_

 

Their correspondence letters were frequent though Joaqui's letter rarely told him of anything that happens to her other than her thoughts it felt like he was her confidante, he made sure to hide her letters. There were days though that it felt like Joaqui was making use of their correspondence as a way to practice her script, somehow he didn't mind it at all.

 

 _How's John by the way?_  , he wrote in his letter curious whether the rabbit was still in good condition. The reply though made him smile despite the odd thoughts Joaqui had written with it. John was still apparently in love with Sherlock, in here he assumes that Joaqui is Sherlock, though the next line didn't make sense to him at all since he had forgotten who Mary was that is of course until he googled it and realized something.

A quick call into Aunt Rachel's confirmed that apparently Joaqui had fallen in love over the summer.

"First love" Aunt Rachel told him over the phone and Tom could sympathize if only he didn't know that Joaqui's interest in the opposite gender sorely lies on the fictional ones.

 

He missed something in the letters.

 

- _ **1461**_

 

At the age of 13 Joaqui was already hitting her early puberty, Tom found himself stunned when greeted by the familiar emotionless face of Joaqui he had just finished his growth spurt and found himself popular to towards the females and some males but Joaqui's blank stare grounded him. He chuckled and offered her a shaky hello before asking, "Remember me?"

 

He still didn't know where he stood with her despite their shared correspondence.

 

"John" she said with tilt before turning her back and heading towards Aunt Rachel.

"Silly child" she commented and was ignored. 

'Silly child indeed' Tom agreed as he watched the retreating form of Joaqui.

 

Their meeting was less than stellar.

 

The rest of the week was spent in various events he was roped into because of Joaqui's age she only allowed until 9 though Tom noticed she always went to her rooms by 7. He paid this no mind until Aunt Rachel started recollecting to her group of ladies about Joaqui's vacation in her estate he went over to listen curious to the events that were always vaguely described by her thoughts.

"Oh! Joaqui was such cute child back then" Aunt Rachel said dreamily "carried around her plush rabbit John everywhere"

He smiled at this.

"Such a shame she stopped carrying it by the next month" Aunt Rachel lamented.

"Where is it now?" Tom asked brilliantly masking his hurt with fake curiosity.

"Oh, she displayed it in the music room" Aunt Rachel answered and made Tom thanked her before leaving and setting out to find the music room. Not much had changed in the room the black grand piano was still there and so was the couch where Joaqui would always nap. Walking over to the piano where John sat he smiled seeing how well cared for was the rabbit.

 

Light entered the darkened room and Joaqui's silhouette was by the door.

"Good evening" she greeted and he felt it was rude to look at her in her night gown, she was already a growing woman.

"Go-good evening" he greeted back, setting down John just as Joaqui walked over and took it from its place before heading to the couch and laid there, pulling the duvet to herself.

"Good night" she said and fell asleep.

 

Something ended that night.


	2. Chapter 2

"This could not be taken well by the public" Luke told him honestly. Tom remained pensived and Luke had almost thought his question was unheard until Tom spoke again.

"...They do little else" Tom  said softly though it was blank and Luke was even more curious about the girl Tom had chosen.

"Tom?"

"I think you should just meet her" the actor said and for the first time since the idea was brought up, Tom smiled. His publicist remained silent and merely stared at the odd smile.

 

 

**_-1450_ **

 

 

Somehow all of the comfort they had shared in her childhood was gone. Though he would seek her out just for memories sake it seemed that Joaqui's interest in him was non-existent, he was even becoming envious of a plush toy which was obviously well taken care of. Then there was also the surprising fact that Joaqui's room was apparently the music room. 

 

"Joaqui" Aunt Rachel's voice echoed in the empty hallways of her home, Tom slowed down in his tracks.

"Surely, Alex is forgiven now?"

 

'Alex?' Tom wondered as he listened for Joaqui's reply. The silence disappointed him. He heard Aunt Rachel's sigh and Joaqui's enigmatic answer,

"Like everything else, such things are meant to be ruined"

 

Then the unmistakable tap tap tap of Joaqui's heels came and got louder and louder as it neared the corner and towards him. 'How odd it was' he thought 'that I could ,in a matter of a week and half, already identify her sound among the the rest'. He closed my eyes and listened carefully only opening it once it had unmistakably ended right before him.

 

"Tom" she greeted and her eyes were still piercing me like it did all those years ago in the artificial lake.

"Would you like to read by the artificial lake?" he said slightly teasing but he really wanted to spend time with her. He was after all making up for the inexcusable meanness on his part. Joaqui had never been a normal child to begin with.

 

"okay" she said softly, cheeks stained with red.

 

 

"Where are we heading?" Luke asked as Tom drove the car.

"Sussex" he answered simply.

 

 

  _ **-1445**_

 

"Oh, You could understand that?" Tom asked her as he saw Joaqui reading Macbeth.

"It's the fastest way to make me sleepy" was her answer and Tom chuckled this was how all of their days were spent. Reading or in Joaqui's case sleeping by the artificial lake side by side. Their camaraderie was coming back and Tom was receiving smiles from her that was actually visible.

He only had a week left before he needed to say good bye, he had already extended his vacation way too much and he was feeling loathe to leave Joaqui all by herself this time.

"Shut up!" Joaqui mumbled into his side.

"I didn't say anything" Tom said with a raised brow towards his friend's covered face. Glancing upwards, Joaqui's eyes didn't seem that piercing anymore to Tom.

"You think too loudly" she grumbled and went back to sleep. Tom blinked before chuckling and drawing her closer to him.

He really didn't want to leave this peaceful days.

 

 _**-1438** _

 

"I'll be fine, I have Martin to play with anyways" Joaqui told him already fed up with his delaying tactics and Tom didn't like how his heart ache and stomach twisted with the thought of Joaqui with another person, a male to be in fact. Not when she clearly has a crush on this person he has yet to meet.

"But I thought you liked me?" Tom whined and tried to get her to smile at him one last time. All he got was an unimpressed look and a raised brow, he pouted and started to enter the car.

"See you next year, Tom"

"See you next year, dear" he answers back and delights at the red cheeks and smile he received.

 

'Surely, that Martin haven't seen that on her face' He thought as the car pulled away from the estate, he never stopped looking at her even though she had already turned her back.

 

- _ **800**_ **  
**

Their correspondence was slowly dying due to his schedule and Joaqui's schooling not to mention he was not quite sure whether he would be able to visit the estate the next month. Martin was frequently being mentioned in their correspondence and Tom still couldn't quite squash the unnecessary jealousy he felt.

 

He wondered if he was just like the toy he gave her.

 

 

"what are we going to do in Sussex?!" Luke asked alarmed with how fast Tom was going.

"You are going to meet her in person" Tom answered as he went faster.

"Slow down for god's sake!" Luke said loudly slightly fearing for his life.

"We'll be fine!" Tom answered a bit annoyed.

 

_**-730**  _

 

7 years into their friendship he never knew her birthday and yet somehow it was a miracle he was always able to produce a gift on their meeting day. But right now he was going to set aside his heart, for hers that was breaking into pieces once more. Had he known who Martin really was he would have told her to love somebody else. But everything was too late and he had once more failed to be a good friend to her.

 

Somehow for all of their friendship, she was still a mystery to him and she was already growing up.

"Thanks" she mumbled and Tom knew it was worth the scolding he would get tomorrow morning.

 

- _ **635**_

 

  
_Dear Tom,_

_This is an automated mail sent from the past to you in this exact day and time. This is the 10 year old me writing to you. I am currently at a field trip here in the science museum._

_I am sending you this message to tell you that from this day on wards I am no longer part of the living officially. If somehow we are able to remain friends then thank you and if not well then I am the little child in Aunt Rachel's summer villa at Sussex, the one that told you it was not an actual lake but rather an artificial one._

_About the very omnimous part. I am dying...well dying faster than the rest._

 

_This is me cutting of ties with you._

 

_Sincerely Yours,_

_Joaqui_

_Age 10._

_P.S. not sure whether I spelled omnimous right, I'm 10 cut me some slack._

 

 _- **259**_

 

"Getting a lover or a fiance would boost up your popularity, are you up for it?" 

"I know someone who could do that with me"

 

- ** _190_  **

"Oh, Tom! why didn't you tell me you needed to see her?"

"I wanted it to be a surprise, Aunt Rachel"

"Oh...Tom, I'm afraid Joaqui's whereabouts is something I can't divulge"

 

- ** _145_**

"What the hell are you doing in Germany, Tom?!"

"I told you I know someone who could be my wife"

"Is she German?"

"No. but she has a bolthole here"

 

 _**-90** _

"Not in Japan either"

" _If you're looking for Joaqui-san, she's bound to Singapore at this time of the year"_

" _Thank you! Grandma!"_

_"Say hello for me to her, kay?"_

_"I will"_

 

- _ **45**_

 

"She wasn't in Singapore either? Maybe she's already back here in London, Tom"

"One last place before I check there Luke"

"Where to then?"

"France"

 

_**0**  
_

 

Tom stopped at the cottage and saw what he was looking for, Luke shakily climbed out of the car and watch Tom turn off the engine before the two of them walked towards the door and knocked.

 

"Joaqui" Tom said and was greeted once more by her familiar piercing brown eyes.

 

Luke was struck by how young she looked of course all thoughts flew out when the eyes were turned on him, somehow it felt like he was being catalogue the same way a scientist would towards a specimen. Then she spoke and Luke knew Tom would need all his charm for this plan not to backlash.

 


	3. Chapter 3

" 7 years, Let me give you 7 years of my life"

 

The words he uttered that day had surprised her, she had spent her gap year trying to find a career path she could love and not end up regretting, of course it came with a cost. One she was not bothered to pay for, she was afterall dying.

But somehow, someone was just too thick  to understand that she wants solitude therefore she held no shame at being rude to Tom and in front of his...what was the British term for him again?

 

"Has being in the spotlight diminished your IQ, Idiot?"

"Joaqui…"

 

She sighed and let them in though she made sure to show her full displeasure on her face. 

'ah, yes,  _Publicist_ was the word I was looking for'

 "Deal with Iced Tea" She told them as she headed for the kitchen bringing in a pitcher of Iced Lemon Tea and three glasses. There were no snacks. Her cold glare was enough reason for Luke to tell her the reason why they were there but Tom had beaten him to it and so he was resigned from drinking the frankly speaking fake-tea.

"Marry me" 

Luke sputtered though he was ignored. He didn't know what to feel about that.

 

"No." Joaqui answered and drank some of her Iced Tea with a very smug look.

"Please don't be such a-a- a twat!" Tom stuttered. He was after all a gentle man and he did value whatever sort of relationship he had with Joaqui.

"Now, now, no need to be aggravated over a cuppa" Joaqui teased and perhaps it was the truest smile she ever had.

 

"So tell me, what reasons do you have for suddenly proposing to me?" She asked, for all of her fearsome expressionless face, there was a certain charm to be found whenever she allowed her brilliance to shine. Something that Luke was starting to see and Tom was starting to acknowledge fully.

 

"Publicity, he needs it to boost his publicity" Luke answered and Joaqui raised a brow. Then she spoke, " I'm pretty sure maintaining his image as an eligible bachelor would boost his publicity more...or you could let him fake date a fan"

"precisely"

 

"You do not mean-"

"There can only be you, Joaqui!" Tom interrupted and Joaqui's eye twitched in annoyance. In her eyes Tom was being a ginormous idiot, She had long ago stopped their correspondence, She had already gotten tired of humans.

"First off, have you ever thought about the repercussions of having me as your supposed lover?" She asked scathingly, the kind she reserved for imbecile politicians. "I am half your age!"

"16 is the age of consent!" Tom reminded her.

"In England it is! In my country it isn't!" She informed him with great annoyance.

 

Luke could only watched with barely concealed amusement and slight fear. The two of them were going on at each other's throats but Joaqui kept backing away every time Tom stepped forward.

"Goddammit, Tom! Stop using your damn height to intimidate me!" she finally screamed.

 

"I-I'm not!" Tom stuttered thrown out of his equilibrium with Joaqui's non sequitur. He looked towards his publicist who merely nodded his head, in agreement with what the girl had said.

"besides, who the hell says 'There can only be you!' to a person?!" Joaqui added putting her hands on her hips, she added," you lame ass tall git". The 4 hit combo she had used as a final attack made Tom's already red Life Gauge empty.

"Why don't we all take a sit and talk about this like proper adults?" Luke suggested taking pity at Tom who was really struggling not to tear up with the sheer force of his childhood friend, only there is something with the girl that doesn't sit right with Luke. Joaqui already tired with the prolonged standing sat at the chair. It was odd seeing a small chubby girl plop herself down with the petulance of a child and still be a tiny bit adorable.

"Joaqui-" 

"Get away from me you paedophile." Joaqui said to Tom coldly, who had reacted swiftly and immediately sat at the farthest corner away from her. She drank her tea with cold grace and waited for Luke to defend their case.

"So?"

"Ah, that is...I think that making him seem more attainable to the fans by dating a fan would increase his popularity, I can see you already understand the concept of it so there really isn't much to be said right?"

"Wrong." Joaqui disagreed. "First that wasn't what I was asking about but rather why me? other than the fact that the idiot over there suggested me" She said pointing over to Tom who was fidgeting.

"And second, there really is no need to boost this person's popularity, he's charismatic enough and his face is aesthetically pleasing in an obscure way." She had also pointed out.

Luke blinked owlishly and said, " Regarding the first one, Only Tom could answer that as for the second one..." He trailed off and Joaqui got the message easily. She sighed and looked over at Tom who had perked up now that he was receiving Joaqui's attention.

 

"Fine. I'll draw up the papers for this" she said to Tom before she stood up and left the two in living area. Tom couldn't stop the smile on his face from showing.

 

"The following 7 years of your life, I'll definitely give you happiness!" He promised. Even though there was no visible reaction from Joaqui he felt that somehow she believed it despite how irrational everything was.

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy new year! even though the greeting is a bit late, I hope everyone had a fun year even though it took so long for me before I finally updated this fic. Thank you for taking your time to check out and read this story :)

_**Day 1**  _

"Have you finished calling your parents?" Tom asked her.

"Yep"

"How were they?" He asked once she came near him and handed Joaqui her mug filled with tea. She gave him a look which made Tom blushed and merely nod his head before he hastily went out of the kitchen leaving his supposed fiancée alone in the kitchen. Smirk on her face as she watched Tom's retreating back.

 

 _ **Day 5**  _

"Ah, took them long enough to track us down, huh?" Joaqui commented as she looked down on the reporters making a ruckus on the streets outside the flat Tom had found for the two of them.

"Aren't you afraid?" Tom asked as he peeked from behind her, arms wrapped upon her waist. Joaqui hummed, pleased with the warmth Tom was radiating from behind her coupled with the sun's rays that warmed her front.

"Ah, move back, they'll see us" Joaqui told him as she pushed him behind getting away from the window lest they be spotted. "So, Breakfast?" Tom asked still not letting her go, savoring the small amount of trust and affection Joaqui was giving him.

"Ravenous" She answered and pulled away from him. Tom's mind wondering why he had insisted on her actually.

 

 _ **Day 23**  _

It was raining and Joaqui was nowhere to be found. It wasn't until much later when the rain had ceased and he found her just entering their flat, soaking wet and shaking.

"I felt like playing in the rain." was all he got before she stepped into their ensuite bathroom. He squashed the urged to follow her inside. 

 

 _ **Day** **30**_  

It took him an embarrassingly long time before he realized she never did answer his question. This time he didn't backed down.

 

"They were...for the lack of better term-furious."

He was afraid that when he reached out for his hand it would have been rejected however when she had squeezed back, even though her back was turned, it was enough for him to feel- that he was doing something right for her.

 

_**Day 45**  _

When it finally blew off, he was ready to shield her from the worst of it. However he had not expected her to be received so warmly even the hate seemed more like they were teasing. Somehow her natural apathy and eccentricity was useful. He still would not venture too deeply into Tumblr, despite the very interesting ideas she had.

(He still does not know why she was keeping track of Martin)

 

 _ **Day** **55**_  

The first time they actually went out for a date, he was ready to spend his time doing average dating things. (He really should have known better than to expect that.) Somehow they had ended up mostly in the library reading books separately and on one moment she had started a debate over homoerotic subtext between Sherlock Holmes and John Watson.(Surprisingly she made friends at the end of it.)

Their date ended when Joaqui had decided that she has enough books to already borrow. They ordered take out and ate together on the couch rewatching Sherlock.

(He squashed the bitter jealousy of hearing her sigh after Martin)

 

"It has always been one-sided you know" She told him before they went to sleep.

 

_**Day 63** _

Their date was a publicity stunt, further propelled by Joaqui's twitter that had gained a lot of followers. Her friends however were quite happy to pitch in tips on what to wear much to her annoyance, the rest of her followers were quite happy to tell her to just dressed whatever she wanted to.

"You're getting popular as worst dressed person" Luke commented.

"...Ah...What about Ed Sheeran?" Joaqui asked.

Luke had come over to remind Joaqui to get ready for her date. She was still lounging on the couch in her hoodie and (Luke was quite sure that was Tom's) trousers. Luke sighed and just told her to get dressed, still unsure how to thread with someone as eccentric as her.

"ugh..tedious" she commented as she shuffled her feet towards the bedroom she shared with Tom and started looking for clothes she felt like wearing on her own dresser. Finally settling with a blouse and black skirt that gave her a victorian feel before she headed to their ensuite bathroom and started readying for her date.

 

Tom stopped by their flat to fetch her  and just walked in on Joaqui stepping out of their bedroom all dolled up. Even Luke was blinking owlishly trying to pair up the image of the attractive girl in front of him and Tom's fake girlfriend's usual image.

"You look cute." Tom commented and walked towards her daring to look at her over, trying to stop the fluttering in his heart to show in his face.

"Ah...thanks, I guess..." She said and reached out to take his hand. Tom took notice of her light pink manicured nails and when her hand had slot into his. He was much more aware of how small she actually was compared to him.

"Ah...the heels makes me closer to your face!" 

Tom blushed and gently squeezed her hand. She was right and Tom was even more acutely aware of how dolled up she was and still for all of him being consciously aware of her, she was still every bit of a mystery to him.

 

_**Day 68**  _

 

When Tom woke up, it was with a heavy weight on top of him. Groggily he tried to process what exactly was on top of him only to be greeted by the drooling face of his childhood friend, Joaqui, whose breathing made him extra aware of the fact that her breast was just above his stomach which made his crotch, 'definitely sporting a morning erection.' he thought, below her stomach.

"nnn..."

Joaqui protested and clung to him even more. Tom prayed to whatever deity that he would not end up coming just by the sheer fact that a girl was on top of him because that was just so wrong on so many levels he doesn't even know where to start.

"...burger..."

A nudge was all it took for him to groan loudly, enough to wake Joaqui up and ended up sitting on him.

"M-morning?" He greeted her with extreme reluctance.

"morning...?"

Tom bit back a moan.

"ah...do you want me to leave the room while you take care of it? or...?"

"or?!"

She smirked and then said, "provide you wank materials?"

Before he could even react though Joaqui had stood up and was most definitely laughing at him, "jeez, your face!"

He was quite offended and embarrassed.

"I'll leave you to it then...husband."

 

_**Day 70**  _

 

Her parents and his parents met up in a cozy restaurant by the beach were everyone was expected to have fun and get to know each other. In the midst of their respective parent's bit of a language barrier, ("US English originated from the UK, Tom, my Dad just needs to remember that UK pants differs from US pants" Joaqui said with mild annoyance after walking away from her sister.)

Despite the odd vibes he was getting from the Joaqui's older sister, everything seemed fine to him.

(Joaqui begs to differ.)

 

 _**Day 71** _

Midnight came and Joaqui had yet to come to bed with him which led him to take a walk to the shore where she was apparently drinking with her sibling on an poorly made bonfire.

"You're definitely not marrying him for love." He overheard Caccina say.

"Yes, I'm not." Joaqui admitted.

 

There was a pang in his heart.

"So why are you marrying him? Is it for money?" Caccina seemed to be joking but Tom knew that there would always be a little bit of a truth in there.

"No...Tom...He's interesting." 

"Interesting?"

 

Joaqui never clarified and Tom went back to their shared lodgings wondering how long will she find him interesting. Joaqui entered their room and crawled into the bed they shared, where Tom was inbetween awareness and sleep. She reeked of alchohol and a part of Tom's distant mind tells him it is Vodka, she wraps her arm on his torso and uses him as a pillow.

He does not know what to make of it.

 

_**Day 100**  _

 

It took a hundred days before he found the courage to ask.

_Could there be love?_

_Could we live happily?_

_Can I love you?_

 

For the first time since their cohabitation, 32 days since he knew he was sexually attracted to her, knew that she felt enough trust to be able to joke around with him, 29 days since he realized that a part of him was falling for her, knowing that he needs her even though she doesn't need him, and 2922 days since they met and he was not any closer in understanding her.

"It depends." She answered and retreated to their bedroom.

The closed door seemed more than what it was.

A partition between her and the rest of the world which included him but he would be damned if he merely sat there in their minimalist flat and not get the answers he wanted.

 

"On what?" He asked, raising his voice wanting to be heard over the metaphorical and literal block between them.

"On whether I know love, on the basis that I, a borderline sociopath, understands happiness...how long could you love me?" She opens the door and stares back at him. This was perhaps the turning point, which would decide how this arrangement would end.

Whether the gamble that he made on her 16th birthday would end up in a 'Win' or a ' Lose'.

"I could teach you about love and happiness." He told her, clenching and unclenching his hand.

He was probably desperate.

"and about the last one?" She asked softly, openly, and maybe just maybe Tom could finally start making sense of her.

He took a deep breath and exhaled it, pulling her close to him and told her honestly as he innhaled the sweet scent of her shampoo the truth, "I don't know but I think it would take a lot for it to fade."

 

She nods and hugs him back.

 

It didn't felt like a win nor a lose but somehow it was inbetween. 


End file.
